Obesity

Lately, for about the past month I have been seeing images in my mind... It's of an obese man. So round that it's hard to move it's hard to work. As I am sifting through the meaning of this image God is pulling at my heart. How much more do you need Natalie. And I have become convinced that everything is permissible but not beneficial. I look at my life and I am filled to the brim with "wisdom" I have all the spiritual books I can stuff into my mind. I do study upon study. Book after book. Because after all knowledge is wisdom right? And wisdom makes me holy and pleasing right?? As my Lent experience ended yesterday I have already made up the difference in my weight in sweets and goodies in a matter of 1.5 days... I am filled to the brim with food, things, movies, friends, all I could ever want or need is in grasp...

And I feel Obese. If I do not exercise out what I take in then I am just getting larger and larger in my mind. And though my body will obviously never be a physical representation of my food in take my spiritual life will be. Unless I am empty I cannot be filled with nutritious "food". Unless I hunger and thirst for righteousness, unless I help my neighbor, unless I speak the gospel to those in need I will not have the power of God in my life...

And I find myself weak... hardly able to move, where do I take the next step of obedience God... I don't want to be a fat American any more God... I long for this other life but do not have the boldness to live it out. God would you renew my faith in such a way that it's not just intake but output as well..

Amen...